Yes, we have a new family member…Meet Qi (or Chi), sometimes called Chewie for reasons you can probably suspect.

This little fur ball joined our family a few weeks ago and changed everything! That cute face can make anyone let their guard down and forget that you need to be the one setting the tone in the house.

They say that when the student is ready the teacher will appear. I can’t say that I was ready, but I definitely learned some lessons quickly.

Lesson 1: Prioritize sleep!
It’s been a while since we had a baby in the house so I forgot how important sleep is for us. We had to shift our schedule around and prioritize sleep for everyone, so that we can be resourced enough for the next day. Getting enough sleep is the different between a “bad day” where any interaction is a trigger, not to mention additional stress and calories (did you know that when you sleep less than what you need, you tend to eat 500 calories more a day? Also, sleeping 5 hours a night has the same effect on the brain as being drunk?) and a day when you feel resourced enough to handle life.

Lesson 2: Establish boundaries
Oh, how many times did you find yourself in a situation – whether attending an event you didn’t have the energy for or helping someone when you were depleted – because you had a hard time saying ‘no’? Well, having a puppy – yes, even a cute one like this one – definitely challenged my ability to establish boundaries. To a puppy, ‘no’ means nothing at first until you make it clear that it actually means what you said.

Lesson 3: Be short, clear, and firm
Part of establishing boundaries is being short, clear, and firm. But first, you need to know your limit, check in with yourself to understand what you need, and then saying it clearly and firmly, while keeping it short, with no need to over-explain. Keep the focus on yourself by stating what is true for you. Remember that event you did not want to attend? Next time, you can say “I appreciate the invitation and it sounds great, but right now I need some time for myself.” Short, clear, and firm.

Lesson 4: Practice, practice, practice
This is pretty self explanatory, but sometimes we can be tough on ourselves when we don’t do it “right”. The point is not to do it right, but to practice. Any skill takes time. At first it might feel awkward and then, it can feel empowering.

My learning continues…and so does my work. Next week, I’ll share some news! In the meantime, take care of yourselves and please reach out if you need support!